Examples of Excellent Parenting

Here is my boy in all of his Mini-Hugh Hefner glory. This picture was taken on Christmas day as I toiled endlessly putting together one of his many LEGO sets.

Apparently, he thinks going around with his pajama top unbuttoned is a cool thing. Notice the lounging position in his new Ikea Poang chair. He even has his legs crossed like a little adult facsimile. And the crowning piece is the toothpick he has. Which he stole from the Christmas Eve party he went to the night before and squirreled away in his room until this exact moment. 

There are so many things about this whole image that worry me on so many levels but such is life. I am going to try and go with the flow. 

Case in point: While riding in the car last night with my boy to dinner, the following conversation took place. 

First, allow me to set the scene. It’s Sarge, my boy and me as my girl was spending the night out. We’re riding to the restaurant listening to music on the radio and I am enjoying the relative peace of children not fighting in the backseat.

When all of a sudden, the following comes out of my boy’s mouth. 

“I like rich people.”

Now, what I heard was “I like witch people” as my boy still has some speech issues with his “R” sounds. So I am furiously trying to think of what he could possibly mean by this statement. Witches? What? What are witch people and when has he met any?

Sarge, though, completely understood what he had said. 

“Son, how many rich people do you know?”

“None.” my boy responds. 

I look over at Sarge and I can see it in his face. Some smart-alec comment is on the verge of coming out so I immediately say to Sarge “Don’t say it.”

My boy picks up on this interchange between his parents and questions us “What? What? Don’t say what?”

Sarge then says, “Your mommy and I are rich. Rich in love. That’s what you want.”

My boy then asks me “Is that what you didn’t want him to say?”

I tell him yes. I mean, this was not the time to tell him that his father was going to make some smarmy comment that would make an indelible impression on his young mind (which Sarge often does anyway, darn the consequences).

My boy thinks about this for a moment and tells us “No, I like the people with a lot of money.”

I’m doing such a great job of parenting.

Making my own little materialistic heathen one step at a time.